Finding People

As with all posts in Part III, go read the intro, “Doing Debucketing Safely” first.

I am unsure whether the nongood cores of other single good humans, especially those with my mental tech who are trying to save the world, tend to need friendship of other single good humans who are mostly similar, or if friendship with more normal people (or single good people uninterested in this mental tech) will suffice. For me, I need single good humans, and I’ll talk about one good way to handle that in this post.

I, and as far as I can tell, Gwen, fell in love with Ziz for a while, in the sense of “I want this person to support me and be close friends protect me”, and this was kind of a horrible idea, but also kind of inevitable due to our situations. Because like, being around an at-least-single-good person with agency will make your nongood core go, “I know that falling in love with them will satisfy this desire to have a friend who has with values in common with me!”, and then you will fall in love. Fortunately the feeling weakened when I found a probably-single-but-maybe-actually-double-good girlfriend, though it’s still there.

Be fucking careful with who you fall in love with, because bonds between people with either one or two good cores, can be way the fuck stronger than even the strongest bonds that nongood people form. If you’re single good, the strength of such a bond will be incredibly delicious your nongood core. So, be aware that if a single, or especially a double good person is basing their decision of how much time to spend with you on how likely you are to help them save the world, you will be more and more incentivized to misrepresent yourself to them to get their attention and approval, the fewer other single and double good friends you have/perceive yourself as being able to make.

Anyways, in case the “attraction only to at-least-single-good humans” thing generalized beyond the two of us, as it probably does, here’s some tips that have only partially worked for me, since it’s still an unsolved issue, but that will probably help:

First, probably vegan activism groups and vegan/vegetarian meetups are an unusually good place to meet single and even double good humans. Trans support groups are particularly good for it, because most single good people are actually bigender whether they know it or not; bigender single good people make up like 25% of my local trans support group, and if you have internalized transphobia they can probably help with that too. I guess you could try looking in LessWrong/EA spaces, if you want to filter on “will take mental tech seriously and has a lot of trans (and thus probably some single good) people”, though if you are trans you may not find those communities very welcoming.

Also, you can like, poke me, since I’m open to meeting people! Just leave a comment.

And, here we are, at the end of Mental Engineering. Go back and work through Parts I and II if you just read all of this and haven’t yet. Leave a comment below if you need help with any of this. And, take care of yourself out there. <3

Next Post, praxis route: Go back and do this IRL, right now

Next Post, theory route: Part IV Introduction